Have you ever heard “That’s only true for you”? The thinking goes like this… Since each of us came from different backgrounds with various experiences we each view reality from our own perspective. Like the blind men describing the elephant. The one who grabs the leg says, “it is like a tree.” The one with the tail says, “It is actually more like a rope.” The one who holds the elephant’s trunk says, “No, it is a big hose.” The point of the parable? We all view things differently from our experience.
True. But these blind men were all wrong! Their experiences and observations as blind men were inadequate. They needed help and the humility to ask for it. What about you? Could you be blind too? Are you open to get help?
There are other problems with this concept of a personal reality. Do we each really have our own personal universe? Do we create our own reality? What a lonely existence!
The thinking goes like this… If my goals and values are unique, then I am in a better position to judge how I conform to my values than anyone else. I know my own reality and situation best, so others have no right to tell me how to live.
Individualists reject the right of others to question their moral actions. The question is: Who or what is the authority behind my morality? If I am the authoritative source of what is right and wrong for me, then it is irresponsible for me to allow others to impose their moral beliefs and standards on me. Why? Because others lack the direct knowledge about my feelings, goals, and values. If it is legal, then why should you judge me as immoral. If it is not legal, then perhaps we need to change the law.
There are positive elements of individualism. This view of life recognizes the ownership and commitment that comes from freely chosen beliefs. It is correct in pointing out the extent of our personal freedom, but remember that freedom also carries responsibility, and there are a few problems.
- From the air we breathe to our planet’s distance from the sun, we are at the mercy of our environment. Reality reminds me that I am not in control of my own existence.
- We face any number of man-made threats like accidents, disease, war, and terrorism that might shorten the meager number of years we live on this planet. I am not independent.
- Individualism has a flawed sense of achievement. In theory you set your own goals, then measure your performance and worth against them. However just as athletes are not judged only by their own goals but according to standards set by an authority, so it is for education, work, and much of life. We don’t make the rules or set the standards for our success or failure. If the significance of my life is judged by my accomplishments, then others ultimately determine whether I am a success or failure. I am not the authority.
Personal reality is of course, a delusion. What then is a reliable basis to evaluate your significance?
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